The Power of Words {and good old fashioned conversations}

“Better than a thousand hollow words, is one word that brings peace.”

Thank you, Buddha.  I think that is a perfect way to start my post today.

For the first time in over a week, I woke up with a smile.  No, I don’t get to go back to work.  Nor can I pick up Ella or do a whole lot of anything physical, but the metaphoric black clouds don’t seem to be looming over my head today.  What a feeling!

I woke up overhearing a conversation between Ella and Derek about her poopy diaper (yes, she talks about the poop) and her ladybug star projector toy.  It was adorable.  Then she actually let me do her hair.  A nice little ponytail with a barrette to hold back her bangs.  {I so love that her hair is finally growing.}  She yanked it all out and I had to do it again, but I bribed her with a fruit snack for the car ride to Mama Tracy’s.  It worked and the ponytail stayed!  I kissed her goodbye and told her I loved her.  Ella hugged and kissed me back and said, “Me lovey you.”  I was brimming with a happiness in my heart.  The feeling is almost impossible to turn into words.  They left and I was full of a joy that I haven’t felt in a while.

Of course I couldn’t just let it go and move on about my day. I had to peruse Pinterest, sip my coffee, and think about the cause for my new mood.  I don’t try to be this way, my friends.  It’s just the way I am.  I like to think that I’m an analytical type, but it’s really just because I have nothing better to do.  I over-think everything.  It’s a curse.

So here we are, finally, at the theme of my post.  The thesis, if you will.  Words carry great meaning and affect (not effect) our experiences and shape our realities as humans.  Duh, you’re thinking, right?

Well, for the last week or so I have been devoid of humans (other than Derek and Ella) and, therefore, words.  Sure, I read and respond to Facebook posts, read books and watch TV, but it’s not the same.  They’re not true conversations.  And I’m not saying that my conversations with Derek and Ella are meaningless and don’t count either.  They do count, but contact with “the outside world” is really good for my soul.  I’m a social gal and have a gift for gab.  What I am saying is that I think that all the conversations I have had with friends and family in the last week have helped to lift my spirit.  {Yay, we have reached the thesis!  I know I ramble.}

Please know that if I didn’t have an actual conversation with you, but you sent me kind words digitally or in a card, I appreciate you and your thoughts.  You helped me too–more than you know.

So, when I say conversations, I mean good old fashioned conversations over the phone.  You know, where we hear each other’s voices.  Sure, they were on cell phones and maybe we had to call each other back 4 or 5 times, but we shared a dialogue and maybe some laughter.  Laughter.  That’s something you don’t hear when you text or email or tweet or status post.  LOL just doesn’t have the same soul warming effect (not affect) that real live laughter has.  True story.

Let me share some examples:

  • A longtime (14 years) Colorado friend and I talked yesterday about how he’s renting his extra bedrooms out to Saudi Arabian study-abroad college students.  They’re 21 and have never talked to women that are not family, let alone rounded 1st base.  We actually discussed, in detail, about how we need to find them some slutty, but not-too-slutty, girls who will show them the ropes.  Yes, we went there and it was pretty damn funny!
  • On Weds, another longtime friend (19 years) called me to ask how I was doing.  Apparently, I was whining and he offered me some cheese.  Then he started to whine about his life too.  We had a full on conversation about how I am red wine and he is white wine.  I postulated that red wine is more intense.  He insisted on him being the Pinot Grigio in the bottle with a dragonfly label and not the boxed White Zinfandel that you find at the mall.  I loved that conversation.  It was funny!
  • My grandma called me on Tuesday.  One of the first things she said was, “My darling granddaughter, you’re just a mess!”  She always says it like it is.  And then she followed that with her signature laugh that you can’t help but join in and laugh along with.  Yes, it’s true, Grandma, I’m a mess, but hearing you laugh lightened my spirit.
  • I spoke with my mother-in-law last night.  This was a fun conversation and we shared a few stories.  We laughed about her tying first place in a golf tournament–but only because of her handicap.  We also laughed when we pictured Ella and Logan (both her granddaughters) being flower girls in Derek’s sister’s wedding this October.  She won’t be there and I promised to video tape it for her.
  • I spoke with my other mother-in-law on Weds evening.  This was a nice conversation too–full of kind words and well wishes.  Ella was running around our living room and was having all sorts of conversations with no one in particular while I was on the phone.  Eileen could hear her and chuckled a few times.  She loved hearing Ella’s little voice.  It was a proud mommy moment for me.
  • My sister called me on Monday.  She shared some good news about her cat having IBS just like his auntie (me).  With treatment, this cat may have a few more years in him.  Yay!

Anyway, I think you get it.  Sorry.  Brevity has never really been a strength of mine.

My point is this:  thank you.  Thank you for all of your kind words, thoughts, prayers, and gestures.  Thank you for the conversations. I needed them.  I needed them to feel like a fully functioning human being again.  I’m a mother and a teacher and a wife, and I have been unable to perform all of these jobs for a week.  It has obviously gotten to me.  Hearing so many kind and comforting voices is what has helped me get through the loneliness and pain.  The clouds are lifting, my friends, and I thank you.
Happy Friday.  Happy Weekend.  Be kind to one another.  I will leave you with this:

“May you have warm words on a cold evening, a full moon on a dark night and a smooth road all the way to your door.”
Irish Blessing

xoxox ~Marisa

P.S.  I hoped some of you sensed me trying to be “ironic.”  I guess being ironic isn’t just something you find in literature and life these days.  It’s almost like a style.  Weird.  Anyway, the fact that I’m a digital blogger talking about old fashioned conversations is ironic.  I also showed you the difference between affect and effect.  OK, I guess if I have to point it out, it’s not irony.  Bye.


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